Yikes, Monday already...

I tend to look forward to each Monday, as it's the one day, where I feel like a part of the world, vocationally and socially. Although, I haven't been super productive today. Outlined my goals with my job coach type this morning, thought, I'd scheduled my ride, but probably didn't, or they confused, what I'd said, but got a ride, and had a marginally productive day in 'the office'. I'm attempting to make a historical building marginally handicapped accessible, for kids with mobility issues. Some days I go in, and feel like this project may not be possible, and kind of tread water. Other days I go in, and get stuff done. I was pretty pleased with myself Monday, as I had little to no direction, and began drafting a grant proposal to a local foundation. I've never written a grant before, and the website wasn't particularly informative regarding requirements, so I had zero to go on. I'll have to wait until next week, to get any feed back about what I wrote. The most difficult thing about this internship, is that I only go in once a week. It's like going in full steam ahead, and being cut off every week. In order to get things done, I need to devote myself to a project and do it all at once. Otherwise, I wind up distracted and off track. Which might be why I've been there 4 months haven't accomplished anything tangible... Yet. My therapists like to tell me I feel this way, because of my brain injury. I find those statements ridiculous, because these are the exact same frustrations I experienced in college. I can't decide if I feel lucky I remember so much of who I was, or not. On the one hand, that is the reason why I push so hard to get the desired result, but it also means I'm constant measuring myself, to an 'impossible' dream. Obj, that's not a great way to word it. How about the sky's the limit. There we go...

I've also decided I despise waiting for the bus home, in the dark. I freak out that the driver won't see me, or that I'll fall in the road, if I stand to close to it. Though, I'm happy to report none of that happened. Eventually, the bus came, and I got back to my apartment and happily dug into the quiche I'd made the night before. Yes, I cooked something. Can you believe it? Not bad either. Only thing it was missing was meat. But, I have a strange phobia of cooking meat. Love to eat it, but have somehow convinced myself, if I'm responsible for-cooking it, death may occur. Probably because I know nothing about cooking it. This may also be why whenever I go out to eat, I've earned credibility as a voracious carnivore. Oh well, there are worse things...