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Sunday, July 29, 2012

RunRunRun?

So, upon my return from the Push America Trip, I learned of the Marine Corps Marathon, and rashly decided to do it with friends I'd met on the trip. I really want next year to be my marathon year, and thought it was the best plan, until I realized the marathon was this October. I know I ran impromptu 'marathon' in the VCM this year, but part of running as a pirate meant that I didn't feel obligated to run the entire course, and I was more than fine with the path we took. However, if I'm going to commit to registering for a full marathon, I am damn well going to do the whole thing.

After being regained fearsome tales of stress-fractures, I immediately ceased that notion. Although, on Friday, I heard from the Adaptive Sports Center in Crested Butte, offering me potential dates in September. I was immediately stricken by the possibility, but also hesitant, as Sep. 11th is not only my birthday, but also the 5 year anniversary!? of this strange and peculiar life I now lead. That being my brain injury debacle. I feel like I'm finally in a place where I might want to celebrate the accomplishments and changes my life has been through in the past 5 years. They say it's a long haul, and that could not be more correct. I was really unable/ unwilling to accept my mental deficits for the majority of this time. It's all a relearning process to me, and I easily take offense to how I m referred to as, or even my perception, of what I think others think when they see me, or meet me. This is a terrible habit of mine, and is often self debilitating for me. But, the more I put myself out there, and get over my own fears, the more I realize no one is actually judging me. They're more so either afraid of me, like, "I don't know how to approach someone about their disability," kind of afraid. At least that's how I describe it. Though the few who do approach me, I always walk away from those conversations feeling like I've learned something about the overwhelming faith and kindness in humanity. So, to all the people who ask me why I run, I run not only to retrain my brain and body how to run to the best of its ability, but also because I appreciate how much I'm learning about the beauty and grace in other souls.

2 comments:

Julie/Mom said...

I love how each new accomplishment is a re-awakening for you and that you can realize and appreciate it. This is true for all of us but we rarely can see it! Keep on running, my love, your free spirit is shining on!!

Marti said...

Court - you represent the best of what humanity has to offer.

My hero!